Having Difficulty Understanding Your Children?
Understand your children through our
World No.1 parent education program
Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T)
by Dr. Thomas Gordon
I Want To Know More
Having Difficulty Understanding Your Children?
Understand your children through our
World No.1 parent education program
Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T)
by Dr. Thomas Gordon
I Want To Know More

Dr Thomas Gordon

Founder of Parent Effectiveness Training, Gordon Training International

Dr. Thomas Gordon’s, Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.) class is the pioneering program that has helped millions of parents around the world. We have classes offered by certified P.E.T. Instructors throughout the United States and in many different countries.  If you’ve heard of I-Messages and Communication Roadblocks (both created by Dr. Gordon), or Active Listening (created by Dr. Carl Rogers), it’s because of P.E.T.
Whether you’re the parent of a toddler or a teenager, you know that parenting can be challenging–even overwhelming at times. Unfortunately, children don’t come with an instruction manual. And, being a parent doesn’t always mean that you automatically or instinctively know what to do.
Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.) offers proven communication skills that really work. When they use these skills, parents are amazed with the dramatic improvement both in their families and in all their relationships. This program was created by award-winning psychologist and three-time Nobel Peace Prize Nominee, Dr. Thomas Gordon in 1962.


books sold
since 1962


spread with P.E.T


professional P.E.T
instructor worldwide


Nobel Peace
Prizes Awarded

Parents Effectiveness Training (P.E.T)

The Core Skills

Parent Effectiveness Training or P.E.T. is the world’s No. 1 parent education program.
P.E.T. is a skills training and relationship-based course which sets the family to have
democratic, collaborative relationships.
Active Listening

Active Listening is a skill that the you can apply to reflect back what the child has expressed to let him know you are listening. It allows you to check back you understanding of their meaning (facts and feelings).

Shifting Gears

“Shifting Gears” is a skill that allows the parent to Active Listen to the child after they have sent an I-Message. The likelihood that the child will hear the parent and change their behavior is much greater if they Active Listen to the child’s problem. This in turn lowers the child’s “emotional temperature” and helps the child to problem solve.


In P.E.T., an I-Message is a form of an assertive communication of the parent. I-Messages are about the feelings, beliefs and values of the parent expressed as a sentence beginning with the word “I”, and is contrasted with a “you-message”, which often begins with the word “you” and focuses on the child.

12 Roadblocks

Roadblocks obstruct the flow of communication between the parent and child. These are the traditional and almost automatic responses of parents to children when they are faced with problem situations. Roadblocks communicate a desire to change the child and unacceptance of the way the child is at the moment. Roadblocks often cause the child to stop talking and feel resentment.

Behavior Window

The Behavior Window is the framework which informs the parent what communication skills should be used — Active Listening or I-Messages or No-Lose Conflict Resolution, among others. The concept of “problem ownership” and its relationship to acceptance and non-acceptance of a child’s behavior is the central integrating component of the P.E.T. course.

No-Lose Conflict Resolution

“Let’s work together for a solution that meets your needs and meets my needs. Both of us will win, no one will be a resentful loser.” — No Lose conflict resolution method is also called Method III in P.E.T. It is based on a very different set of assumptions than the power-based methods of solving conflicts between parent and child such as the authoritative method (parent wins or Method I) and permissive method (child wins or Method II).

Interested in having better
relationship and understanding of
your children?
Contact us for more information about our courses.
Parents Effectiveness Training (P.E.T)

The Core Skills

  • For Parents, educators, councilors, social workers, and caregivers, and adults who deal with children.
  • P.E.T. is a complete model of effective parent-child relationships which works for all different kinds of families.
  • It works with children of all ages, from the very young through the rebellious adolescent years.
  • It works in parent-child relationships that have begun to deteriorate and it works to prevent problems before they occur, i.e., “training before trouble”.
  • It also works for single parents, stepparents and grandparents.
  • And it works in all cultures.
Parents Effectiveness Training (P.E.T)

What are the benefits?

All P.E.T. workshops are taught by certified instructors who are trained and certified by Gordon Training International and Gordon Parenting . You will learn to:
  • Listen to your children so that they feel genuinely understood and accepted.
  • Talk to your children honestly and non-blamefully when their behavior causes you a problem.
  • Resolve conflicts and problems in your family so that no one loses and problems stay solved.
  • Deal with value collisions.
  • Troubleshoot family problems and know which skills to use to solve them.


“His mother and I were involved in the Parent Effectiveness Training at our church and the thing they taught us which is so central and significant is that you should never demean you child.”

William H.Gates Sr.
Father of Microsoft founder Bill gates

“I commend Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T) for empowering parents to improve their relationships with their children, so that they can be the loving parents they always wanted to be, so their children can flourish, and their warm connection to each other can endure through life.”

Dr. Louise Porter
Child Psychologist/Parenting Author

“I am an alumni. Must have done it when Ari was still tiny. I found the course incredibly useful. It has served me well for both our kids as well as in adult relationships. You should do it!”

Mrs. Gym Miller

“This was a big step forward: a really big step, you go up and up, you become more wise, more insightful, you can process better what you hear, you can react in a better way, it rockets you, it may have taken you five years to start thinking of all these things, because they all sound


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